Homer Simpson Wisdom

Near Lowman Idaho

Two weeks ago I did some work for my brother. He’s the main dude in charge of the campaign for Senator Mike Crapo (the senior senator for the state of Idaho). I drove over the entire state of Idaho to put signs up that say simply “CRAPO”.

Unless you know about Mike Crapo you could wonder if the sign is a statement about the current political climate or a joke for a fake candidate.

Vote Crapo – why not? It seems that no matter what, we’re voting for Crap-0.

Just after I wrote that last line I sat back in my chair and considered deleting it. But I won’t because it’s marginally funny and marginally true. In the famous words of Homer (Simpson).

“It’s so funny ’cause it’s true.”

Upon further sitting back in my chair and thinking about it I believe that there are a lot of good, honest, noble men and women willing to risk their reputations, fortunes and spend years of their lives in service of us, the American people. I would not want to head to Washington to help out. For that reason, I applaud them and their nobility.

Anyhoo..

Lowman is a sorrowful name for a town, isn’t it? Well it’s a sorrowful place with an exultant location. I made this photo on one of my many pit stops across the vast state of Idaho.

I drove for 6 full days. When I say full I mean that I drove from 7AM to 10PM. I drove 3300 miles in those 6 days. I had time to think.

Here’s what I thought:

  • I love to see new places, like Winchester, Idaho.
  • Idaho is very empty (peopleless)
  • The drive to Salmon from Idaho Falls is long
  • Sam is a great Mom
  • Sunflower seeds actually can keep you awake. But the tiniest sliver of a husk in your throat can spoil your immediate future.
  • I missed my wife. Sleeping alone in cheezy hotels is bad.
  • The Palouse Prarie is stunning
  • Red vines aren’t as good as they used to be. Did they change the recipe?
  • California is crazy
  • My bankruptcy was brutal
  • Grangeville is like a town from the 50’s
  • Kimi is the sweetest organism on planet earth
  • I need to listen to Bailey more carefully. What is she saying to me?
  • My tender little girls need more of their daddy
  • The new dill pickle flavored lays potato chips are nasty
  • Jack wants to go skiing this winter, so do I
  • My kids are growing up
  • Bailey will be in college in 6 years
  • I miss my friends in California
  • Downtown Moscow is cool
  • My hair is thinning. Sad
  • I don’t think I’m a dog person or a cat person
  • I love the retro-throwback mountain dew
  • I really want to build Sam’s dream house
  • My doorstep is the most beautiful place in Idaho

I’m not like the Allman Brothers: A ramblin’ man. But some of the lyrics of the song ring true. I’ve highlighted the line that’s “true” to me.

Listen here

Lord, I was born a ramblin’ man, (I wasn’t)
Tryin’ to make a livin’ and doin’ the best I can. (This line applies)
And when it’s time for leavin’,
I hope you’ll understand,
That I was born a ramblin’ man. (chorus)

Well my father was a gambler down in Georgia, (mine was a radio DJ in Idaho Falls – KUPI)
He wound up on the wrong end of a gun.
And I was born in the back seat of a Greyhound bus (I was born in Moscow Idaho)
Rollin’ down highway 41.

Chorus

I’m on my way to New Orleans this mornin’,
Leaving out of Nashville, Tennessee,
They’re always having a good time down on the bayou,
Lord, them Delta women think the world of me.

Chorus

Lord, I was born a ramblin’ man, etc.

6 comments

  1. My alma mater has a building named Crapo Hall. Admissions is always careful to explain to prospective students that it’s pronounced “cray-poh.”

  2. You are right..sunflower seeds do keep you awake and getting a sliver stuck in your throat makes you wonder if you should be eating them while driving after all!

    Love the post bro!

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